remembering who I am.

After a nice chat with my lady friend Vanessa, I decided it was time to get me back. Whenever life is a little stressful my first response is to shut down, share less, and try to control more. This really isn't me, and I don't like being that way. I love that I have a good honest friend that tells me what I need to hear, and a husband that doesn't let me make emotional decisions {uhem, letting my blog go private!}.

I am letting go of what I can't control, and realizing a lot of things I thought I had control of...I never did anyway.

I am embracing who I am, again. Take it, or leave it.

I am remembering why I love blogging. There is a list of really good reasons I do it, and only a few things that really bug me. I started to worry that people might not want to read if I decide to talk about certain things, and then I realize they have a choice to do so. I love the relationships that I have because of blogging, and it all started because I dared to be myself...So, I am doing what I do best...I am back to being me.

PS Free Zoo day was fun, and not as cold as I thought it would be. I think the next play date will be the Treehouse Museum.  I will post more details when I figure it all out.

reminder: play date #2

Tomorrow is our play date at the Zoo.

It is FREE to get in the Zoo tomorrow.

We are meeting at the entrance at 10:00 AM.

If you have any questions either comment, or email me at sellpartyof {at} gmail.

...and he changed.

Devin fell in love today.

It was possibly the cutest thing I have witnessed.

Devin was full of kisses for the baby, lots of gentle rubs on his head, and a whole lotta rocking the car seat.

After the baby left he dragged me downstairs in search for his baby, and then started to whimper when he realized he was really gone.

Paul and I both mentioned how much Devin seemed to become a big boy today. It is bittersweet. Who knew that Devin could seem ready for this big brother stuff, and we didn't see it coming.

Thank you BFF for sharing your sweet boy with us.  We enjoyed playing babysitter. :)

this is my lady.

BFF is here in Utah.

Little does she know this little visit has been heaven sent for us.

We love Emily.

Every day Savannah has been giddy when she wakes up knowing it is one day closer to babysitting Emily's brand new baby boy.  {Yup, you read that right...we get to snoozle a brand new baby while she goes to the temple. I am excited to try my hand in this 3 kid biznass!}

One day Paul randomly said he needed to go buy an outfit for her babe. Let me paint you a picture...Savannah, Devin, and Stirling in matching Easter outfits. Yup, it is as cute as it sounds. Paul did good.

It is nice having Emily as not just our friend, but our family.  Stirling is the nephew I will never have, and I am thrilled to spoil him rotten!  We feel so lucky to have her, and everyone that she has so willingly shared...{her family is a dream!}

People often ask how I do it without family...here is one of my many answers...

PS If I can stand to put the baby down for long enough, I may take some pictures. :)

wordless wednesday: enjoying the afternoon by the fire

our holiday.

I am going to be honest and I say after the way my morning started out, I didn't have high hopes for it being a good President's Day.

I told a couple of ladies in the neighborhood me and the littles would tag along on a play date this morning. Savannah and Devin decided to fight {yes, they fight EVEN with a large age gap} all freakin' morning, I was losing it...all before Noon! So, I had to skip out on the fun with the ladies.  Savannah was disappointed, because she realizes she is missing out...Devin...well, he got a nap.

BUT just like so many other times, Paul swooped in and saved me and saved my day that was headed South fast. That guy of mine is pretty incredible. He asked me to bring the kids and meet for lunch.  He got there early, ordered the food, and had drinks waiting for us on the table...with food following shortly after. We walked over to the mall, and he bought me some new shoes that don't require me bending over to put them on. He stood in the long line at the cookie shop to buy us all cookies, while I shopped, and spent more of his money. Everyone ended up with a fun bag of goodies to take home, except him.  I tried to make it up to him by letting him take a nap when we got home, while I watched the kids...but I realize that still isn't fair.  I think I will always be trying to catch up to his nice deeds.

Every holiday that comes and goes, I get more excited that I will no longer work retail...that means after having a fun afternoon, I will come home and play some more.  Instead after all was said and done today, I packed my stuff up, and headed to work for the night. Working always has a way of putting a damper on a really good afternoon.

Anyone else brave the crowds today for a really good deal?  I was excited when I scored jackets for the babies at The Gap for $3. :)

Happy Prez Day!

grown up play date part 1.

Friday night I planned the first {of many, I hope} grown up play date. It was late, because I had to work before I played. It didn't make it any less lovely, IMO. Guess what else?  I didn't end up seeing the movie by myself either! Thank you to the ladies that came to eat popcorn and drink soda with me.

The movie wasn't as bad as Breaking Dawn, and what is more shocking...I didn't even cry.  I know, I know...that is crazy talk.

I planned on taking pictures, but then we started talking about Titanic in 3D and the rest is history. I could even use the excuse that it was late, and I forgot.

Sooo, here is the details.

Next play date is with the kiddies. 

We will be doing the FREE Zoo day.
February 29th.
Meet at the entrance at 10:00 AM.
I planned on going to pick up lunch after, if anyone wants to join us at fast food place close by.

Anything I am missing, or any questions...you can either email me or just leave a comment {sellpartyof @ gmail}.

Anyone have suggestions for some fun grown up play dates?  I am all about eating and movies...but I am open for getting crazy on the roller skating rink or something. :)

mommy ftw.

Savannah is a pretty easy child.  Occasionally she can get sassy, and sometimes she feels picked on and whines...but it is easily fixed.

This week ended up being an "all about Savannah week".

Last week it seemed like it was "all about Sabrina week".

Devin manages his time in there somewhere, and Paul really gets the short end of the stick.  I am still trying to figure out how to manage my time for Daddy.

We spent a lot of time on Savannah's big earth worm project for science. She was sure proud of her poster, and enjoyed practicing in front of all of us.

Savannah has been whining that I never come volunteer in her class.  I would say she is being dramatic, but it is true.  I try to avoid doing classroom help, and like to make up for it in little gifts for her teachers instead. This week I volunteered not once, but twice in her classroom...she was one happy girl when I surprised her both days.

One day I checked her out of school 45 minutes early {which she thought was hours} so that I could take her to a late lunch with Devin and I.  She beamed.  One day I even took her a happy meal for her lunch at school, instead of making her eat what I had packed from home!!

Friday I was the first car in the car pool lane to pick up.  Do you know what that means people?  I had to get to her school an hour early and sit in my car.  It was totally worth it when I saw Savannah thrilled to be the first student pull out of the parking lot. After that I told her that I had saved Devin's nap for when she got home so that her and I could have a "movie party". I had picked up treats from the gas station, popped popcorn, and let her eat on my side of the bed. :)

Tonight she really wanted me to set up the pack-n-play in her room for her baby doll. I didn't want to, but I did it anyways...because it really isn't that hard to do {I just like to complain}.

I hope she remembers all these things next week when I am little grumpy and feeling off, or when I have to tell her she has to go to bed early.  Most likely she won't. The good thing is, I never get sick of showing those people I love just how much you mean to me.

change happens.

I knew before this year started it was going to be a doozy for change...and boy was I right.

We had Stake Conference a couple of weeks ago, and wards were changed {again}. I couldn't help but watch all the little kids in the hallway crying that first week. They were missing what they were use to...teachers, friends, schedules. They teach us at church that change is necessary, but it doesn't make it easy.

Change is hard.

Our family is changing. Some may only notice our newest addition, but we are noticing much more than that. It is hard to realize you will never have relationships you hoped for. Some of what makes this hard is knowing what you were hoping for was only a wish, or a dream, and probably would have never happened anyways. We are letting go of what we thought should be ours, and moving foward knowing there is something greater waiting for us.

My work is changing. I will go from getting paid to make decisions, and being responsible for projects...to...getting slobbery kisses for payment, and praying over the decisions I make for my little people. This is something I have hoped for since as long as I can remember. Now that it is going to happen, I am scared.

Change is scary.

We are hoping for a new business adventure in the Fall. It will be a lot of work, mostly for Paul. It doesn't make us not want the change though. We plan as if it will happen, and dream of the endless possibilities.

Change can be exciting.

As I think about how much things are changing, I also think of growth. Paul and I already have a new perspective on life. We are excited for what 2012 has in store, and are ready to tackle it together. We have been through a lot in the past decade +, and have always come out better and stronger people.  Our life may not be perfect, plans may not work out, we may just have our family...but in the end it will all be okay.

Because change is growth, change is exciting, change is hard, and change is necessary.

grown up play date.

Friday night {the 17th}.


The District movie theater.


Seeing The Vow.


Show time is 10:10 PM.


Lets prove we can still stay up late on a Friday night, and have fun.


Email me with questions.


sellpartyof {at} gmail


Everyone welcome...except creepers.

because we love him.

{photo credit: Jennifer Eliason Photography}

Yesterday after missing 10+ phone calls, and getting the lecture of why I even have a phone in the first place...I thought I might just drive Paul crazy enough to not come home last night. :)

When he came home he delivered me a bouquet of flowers and a package of chocolate dipped strawberries. I cried. After everything seemed to go wrong, he still managed to make everything right.

I woke up this morning to make a special Valentine breakfast for Savannah before school, and we started talking about her Daddy. I loved when she said this...

"Mommy, I mean I don't wanna hurt your feelings on Valentine's Day, but Daddy is much better at grocery shopping than you. He remembers everything, and even buys special things for my lunch."

That girls loves her Daddy, and will defend him to the end...

When I started thinking about Devin, and what he would say about why he loves his Daddy this came to mind.

Devin really hates going to nursery. He hates strangers. He doesn't give his love freely. When I say let him cry it out, and he will get use to it...Paul stays with him. When Paul goes past his classroom, and sees him sitting on a chair in the corner by himself...Paul goes back in and comforts him. I am sure Devin appreciates this.

And then there is baby Sabrina, and why she loves him. When we found out we were having her, Paul was the one that was excited. When we thought we lost her, Paul was the one that wanted to try to have another one.  When we found out we were still having a baby...he told the ultrasound tech "just tell me it's my girl!"

We are a lucky little group of people to have a guy like him around.

We love you Daddy!

a stroll down memory lane.

We didn't have much planned today, besides make a little money (this means we all go to work with Daddy). We slept in until almost 9 (!!!). We worked, and then looked at each other, and both thought what next!? 

I have been on this deli sandwich kick, at least it is better than the Taco Bell one. So, Paul and I started to brain storm places we could go for a really good sandwich.  Paul remembered a few years ago going to this house that had been converted into a deli. We didn't remember the name, we remembered the general location, and we remembered the house being blue...and we were off. We drove up and down streets trying to find that house, and while we drove we remembered all the little things about our newly wed days. We were so poor then, and didn't experience all the finer things of life. We lived a much simpler life.  One that included long walks to find change on the ground, and walking the mall to dream of things we couldn't afford.

(the kids learning how to properly slide down the stairs in pillow cases, sleeping bags, and whatever else they can come up with!)

We eventually found that old blue house we were looking for, and were disappointed to see that it has since gone out of business. Darn economy...that place was good.  So we ended up at Navajo Hogan, and answered the near million questions that Savannah had about before she was born. It was fun to talk about our first apartment, and how much we loved that neighborhood. How much we hated renting, and OMG we have been together a really long time!!

We stopped at Toys R Us on the way home from lunch, and let both kids pick a new toy out. We never can get out of a store without looking for Sabrina something too.  She ended up getting a car seat, and we probably shouldn't talk about how many outfits she ended up with. :)

We didn't do anything spectacular today, except that really long family nap...but it was the perfect way to spend a Saturday.

I am always reminded that it is the simple things that make the best kind of memories for me.  I will go to bed tonight knowing that these 3 little people, and one handsome man I am constantly surrounded by make my life pretty awesome without even trying.

a modge podge of thoughts.

Every day I pick Savannah up from school she is dying of hunger, even with an empty lunch box. I ask her if she eats all of her lunch, and she does. I never remember this as a child, but Paul does. Yet another thing she does that is like her Daddy. She eats an entire meal when she comes home, and still has room for dinner. Maybe I am only slightly jealous that my body doesn't let me eat near the amount of food she does, and be that tiny and cute. That husband of mine gave our kids some good genes.

***

Paul and I are completely obsessed with shopping for our new baby. On average we have been buying 3 or 4 new outfits a week (most of which include polka dots!). Well, then we remember that we have 2 other kids, and need to spoil them too.  Gosh, I could really get myself in trouble. One day we buy Devin shoes, a shirt, and balloons (his favorite)...and then the next day it is new shoes for Savannah. It never ends, and I am okay with it...excuses to spend money are always fun. Paul will most likely disagree.

***

I still haven't figured anything out for a play date for next week. Anyone up for a Saturday night movie, instead of a play date?  I mean, we could go to a late night show, after the kids are in bed. Get ourselves the biggest popcorn they sell, and drink way too much soda! I thought we could go to a kid movie, and bring them along during the day...but then it didn't sound nearly as fun as an hour plus of sitting in the quiet of a theater with a bunch of girlfriends.

***

Could not be more excited that we are one day closer to another weekend. Last weekend we spent the entire Saturday playing, shopping, and eating. Who knew our kids would like Cabela's so much, and it was something FREE. Paul had taken Savannah before, but we hadn't taken Devin. He spent most of the time fearful one of those stuffed creatures was going to come to life, but that fish tank was a slice of heaven for him. It is almost better than the zoo...less walking, no funny smells, and the animals are always visible. :)

***

I never thought that I would be in need a double stroller. Why does this seem so crazy!?  I asked on Twitter awhile back what everyone thought was the best, smallest double stroller was.  Someone suggested the Kinderwagon. I love the look, it is very small, but it hasn't been in stock since November. Oh, and do I want to spend $300 on something that looks like an umbrella stroller!? I don't want anything bulky...so that means I don't want a jogging type stroller.  I went to Babies R Us today, and looked at those Sit 'n' Stands...it was determined that was not the best fit for our active 2 year old.  On the stroll up and down the isle he got out at least 4 times. So give me your suggestions if you have any!!

Okay enough with all the ramblings.

Von...out.

sometimes I forget to be thankful.

(Devin preparing himself to be a big brother...spesh, huh!?)

Some days do you ever find yourself complaining about everything!? I do. Then I get a big ol' slap in the face from reality, and realize I should just shut up and be thankful. Yeah, that has been happening to me a lot lately.

Like one day I thought about complaining that Paul had been gone all. day. long. I was in need of a bathroom break that didn't include a certain toddler. My slap from reality came when I realized that most Mom's don't have a husband that works a few hours a day...and then comes home to help with picking up one child from school, changes that dirty diaper you can't stomach, and doesn't forget to stop for treats. {slap, slap, slap}


One day I was complaining about how Savannah's room was always freaking messy.  I am so done cleaning it, and as soon as I clean it...it goes right back to being messy. Then I had to remind myself, Savannah plays in her room for hours, and has a huge imagination. When I want to take a nap when Devin is, Savannah will play in her room the entire time. {slap, slap}

I was just reading a post that I didn't publish. It said something about I can't believe I have to throw up every day, and I don't even get a baby out of this. Blah, blah, blah.  Well, we all know I am getting a baby out of everything we have been through since October. {SLAP}

So, today instead of complaining I plan on going and telling Savannah's teacher I am thankful for her.  I plan on cleaning, and not complaining...because I know what I feels like to not feel well enough to clean my house.  I plan on mailing out the rest of those love notes I have in my purse...

and I plan to do a lot more thinking before complaining. Because who likes to be around a complainer anyway.

ramblings about my pet peeves.

Yesterday I was in rare form.  Good thing Paul wasn't home for most of it, I was a big hormonal mess. I was going to write a post, but then opted for the much needed nap instead. Can't blame me for that.

I had a huge list of pet peeves yesterday. Most of them seem ridiculous today, but yesterday oh man did they bug me. I was ready to stand up on my soap box, and tell everyone about them.  Good thing I didn't, because I am not sure anyone wanted to read them...or maybe you would have wanted to, because you would have gotten a really good laugh at my expense.

It is lovely to have a new day, a fresh start. I am thinking more clearly, maybe because my peed on carpets are getting cleaned as we speak. Potty training is not for the weak, and right now I am too weak to do it. I am okay with two babies in diapers...because guess what...I get to have two in diapers.  That is fun business right there yo! 

Last night when I crawled into bed I had a note and a picture waiting for me from Savannah. It made my heart melt. Even when I feel like I never should be a stay at home Mom, because my patience is lacking. Even when I think I am doing everything wrong as a Mom...she goes and tells me this...

"I love you Mommy. You are so nice. I love you so much like a billeyen time is how much. I love you on Saturday. It was so fun can we do that again. I can't stop saying how much I love you."

I am doing something right, and need to chillax on the being hard on myself part. We all have bad days, just so happened that Devin and I had a very bad day on the exact same day.

box tops.

Awhile back I saw a few ladies on Facebook asking if there was a list of products that participate in the box top program. Well, look no further, here is a great list! I know that a lot of people think that box tops are just on unhealthy products that they don't purchase...I think you will be surprised to see how many things are not even food related.  My favorite new box top find was on Cottonelle wipes.

I noticed at my local grocery store a place where they are collecting box tops. I was secretly wanting to steal the box, because I wanted Savannah's school to get all the money. {I still am wondering who gets all of them.}  How many people don't participate in box tops, because of one reason or another?  I was just curious.

Want to win a $25 gift card to Sam's Club (that can also be used at Wal Mart)?  Tell me what product you always buy that has box tops on it...you can always cheat with the linky list. :)

Giveaway will end Wednesday the 8th of February.

Disclosure: I was compensated by General Mills through My Blog Spark for this post, and the giveaway was sponsored by them as well.

play date #1

Yesterday our first play date went off without a hitch. It was fun to let the kids run wild, and RAWR like the Dinosaurs! Thank you to the ladies that were able to come (Hey, Tina...I never got your blog url!!).

I decided that I wasn't going to take my camera, and I am only regretting that decision as I type right now.  I loved being able to interact with everyone there, and with my kids.  One less thing to worry about. Maybe every other play date I will take pictures, or maybe we can all take turns being in charge of the camera.

(this picture Rachel took and posted on my wall...cute lil' friends)

I hope that everyone had just as much fun as I did.  After it was all over, I was so glad that we did it. I am excited to plan the next one!

Tina suggested doing the free Zoo day. It is the last Wednesday of all the Winter months.  Sooo, that will be February 29th. I went on the Hogle Zoo website, and couldn't confirm...but I will call and then make the official announcement.

I am still trying to figure out a great play date for the week of Valentines day.  Anyone have any suggestions? Maybe a bounce house place, or a little gym?

planning play dates.

I have had this idea swirling for awhile now. I work part time, and have found some days I have a lot of time on my hands. It is just not my personality to sit at home...I go a little ca-ra-zy, and so do my kids! My original thought was that I would try to have a play date once a week, and then I got realistic with myself. 

I would love to start a play group. I am thinking every other week, and maybe some months it may be more, or less.

Since Savannah is in school all day, Devin and I need friends to play with to pass the time away. A few weeks ago we met some friends at the Dino Museum, and it was really fun. We are hoping to do more of that.

This is the list of things I thought would be fun as play dates (some are as the weather warms up)...

We can do all the things at Thanksgiving Point (Dino Museum, farm, gardens, etc).
Treehouse Museum (looks amazing)
Feed the ducks and have picnic at Wheeler Farm (free, except if you want a wagon ride)
Zoo
We can do the beaches, like we did last year.
Discovery Gateway
We could go the fountain at The Gateway and let the kids run through the water...while we sip lemonade. :)
We could go to West Jordan park, which has a fantastic play ground...or Liberty Park...or all of them!
We could do a arts and crafts with snacks...just at my house.
Heck, we could just do fast food with a great play ground.

Obviously, I am sure everyone has lots of great ideas for free, easy, fun play dates.  Leave those in the comment section.  I am going to buy a big calendar and start planning some of these things. Everyone is welcome, and the more the merrier.

Last year we had a list of things we wanted to accomplish while Savannah was out for the Summer. It was so fun, and I hope this list can be similar. We might even have to repeat play dates if they end up being really fabulous!

Our first play date is kind of short notice.  It is this Friday the 4th. Dino Museum at Thanksgiving Point. Meet at the entrance at 2:00 PM.  I have a pass, so everyone that comes with us will get in for 50% off.

If you have questions...email me...sellpartyof {at} gmail.

wordless wednesday: phew, we were worried.