I went to another Dr. appointment today. Everything is fine, just a routine visit. The Dr. did confirm that I had lost 7 pounds...which isn't a bad thing for someone like me who could stand to lose a bit. =)
At the end of my appointment the Dr. wanted to schedule me for routine testing of all the genetic stuff. Ya know, the tests they run to see if your baby is going to have down syndrome, and what not. I didn't feel right about it when I scheduled it, but I did. I came home, and questioned Paul about it...he has a much better memory than I do, and he jogged my brain about how we didn't do the testing with Van. So I called and canceled the appointment, and thought to myself...
How many people don't do the testing to find out if there is something wrong with their baby? Do you think that you should do it? Do you think that I'm crazy for not wanting it done? I started to wonder, if I did know that something was wrong would I plan differently? After all it is still a baby you are having, even if it has something genetically wrong with it. I will still buy clothes, diapers, and get a nursery set up, right? How could I ever mentally prepare for what would lie head? I don't think I could, I think it would worry me sick. Some may say they would worry themselves sick not knowing, I guess I am just not one of those people.
16 comments:
I decided the same thing with my boys. I figured that the tests can come back positive when in fact the baby is healthy and that would just cause major unneeded stress. If in fact the baby did have down, it would not change anything anyway so why worry about it when you are prego???
Wow, what a tough decision. I have no idea what we'll do when it comes down to it.
hmmm.... that really is a tough one... the human development major in me says absolutely, I would totally want to know and be prepared "just in case"... but you're right about the fact that you're still going to have a nursery to get ready and all that... hmmm.... I really don't know!! The main thing I think is that even if the test comes back "normal", there's still problems that can surface later, such as autism, which would not appear in a test, and I would not love my child any less if that happened.... and you're right, it would cause undue stress during the pregnancy... I guess this is where faith comes into play... the Lord is in control and whatever child you're supposed to have is out of your hands really... but I'm sure baby Bri/Vin is going to be perfect :)
I didnt do the testing with any of my 3 kids either. I was thinking along the same lines as you. I'm still going to do everything the same whether I know or not if there are problems now or then.
I didn't do the testing with any of mine. I figured it would only make me worry... more than pregnancy already does. If there turned out to be an issue, why spend 5 months worrying about something that you can't really do anything about. That is just my thoughts- you should do what makes you the most comfortable.
Seriously, seven pounds? Don't make it a habit. Me, however, would love to be losing weight.
I got tested with the first two...then I decided why? So I didn't with the last two (when there were potentially more risks). I figure that the ultra sound would show anything MAJOR and knowing wouldn't change anything anyway. I watched my SIL go through the pain of hearing her test results and then struggling with the information for months before giving birth to her healthy baby.
I work with children with disabilities every day at work and still don't know or understand how tough/rewarding it would be to be the parent.
I had the tests done with Hannah and they came back with an elevated risk of the baby having Downs, so they sent me to a specialist in Boise to have some tests done. I went there and got the ultrasound and they said they couldn't find anything that looked different and then they asked if I wanted to do an amnio. I had told myself beforehand that I was going to have it done no matter what because I wanted to be prepared if there was something wrong.
So they sat us down and were giving us the risks of doing the amnio and there was a ???% (I can't remember) chance that the baby could miscarry. I decided then that it didn't really matter if there was anything wrong and why would I put my baby at risk for my own selfish reasons of knowing.
With Preslee I decided that I wasn't even going to do the test and was glad.
I think that if there is something major wrong, like heart defects, etc., that they would be able to tell with ultrasound.
Do what makes you feel as ease though. That is only my opinion. I'm glad all went well at your appt. I would have killed to lose 7 pounds. I gained 45 with this baby. Yikes!!!
I applaud you for not wanting those tests done. What I was blessed with could not have been tested for in utero. I didn't find out until just over a year ago about Alex's Autism. I feel that if something isn't "normal" about your baby, you are guided by the Spirit and you are blessed with family and friends that are either in a similar situation or are extremely supportive. In the end, these are all children of God and whatever you are blessed with isn't going to make you love them any less.
With the boys we did. Tyler was fine. Brett, they had me do an extra test. They found out that his heart was wired a little different then most but he's just fine.
We decided not to this time around just because the doctor told us if there was anything major going on, they would most likely find it on the ultra sound.
What could you possibly do if your child had downs? I really don't know. I think it would just worry about it way to much and other family members would also stress about it, and it just isn't worth it to me.
I think you made a good decision.
I would not have the test done, the test can come back positive and your baby is healthy baby and you would have paid for all these expensive tests that were not needed. It is a money bracket. If i had a downs baby I would just deal with the cards handed to me. it is nothing you can't handle or god would not have dealt this hand to you. Stop stressing and just go on being a glowing pregnant woman. You owe it to yourself, Paul, Van and the new little bundle of joy. Personally I think you know what you are doing so stick to it..
I did not get tested with any of my children, except the last one since one of my blood tests came back with a high level of something. i had to do a few tests and those tests came back as either i would have twins or that i would have a downs baby. so we prepared, and of course since i woulnt ever choose to terminate any child of mine, to keep our baby no matter what.......i gave birth and he was absolutely normal. so, to me, the tests do not mean a damn thing!
i didn't get those tests done because i was afraid of it just as you are. my friend DID do it and the test showed up positive for down syndrome. It crushed her.. we were all so worried about what would happen next, you just don't know what to do after you've heard that sort of news. well.. she had the baby and she's fine. no down sydrome, nothing. it was VERY stressful for absolutely no reason. the test gave a false positive and that made my choice even more set in stone. If i do have any more babies, i will not have the tests done, for that reason alone. now that i know how easily a false positive can come about, i would hate to put myself, the baby or anyone else in that positiion of stress. That's just terrible! :( but of course, it's very up to you, this is obviously, JUST my opinion and story.
I think you made the right choice. I wasn't tested with either of my babies. And I was 33 and 35 when they were born. I know it would not have made a difference. Just more worry.
I'm the opposite. I like to be prepared for EVERYTHING. I cope better if I have a plan.
I did the same thing - no testing for me. It wouldn't change anything I would do with the pregnancy. I would not terminate. Plus, a lot of the tests are not super accurate (ie 50% or so) and that just makes people worried when it is nothing. God will give me what I can handle. I will prepare once I deliver and know for sure.
We didn't do the testing with either of the girls. When I was pregnant with The Chicken and declined because of many of the false positives for tests the doctors got a big smile on his face. "Well if you do get a positive you will be able to get an amnio and then you will know the sex of your baby, won't that be great?!?" I declined again stating that unless I medically needed an amnio I was not going to get it done. I know that it would have made me sick with worry if there had been something wrong, very unhealthy for the both of us. I do not regret my choice what so ever.
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